Monday, April 26, 2010

47

He can sing his ABC's now. It is too cute. He skips over a lot of the middle part - mostly because he has a hard time pronouncing the letters separately, but that's ok. I'll let him keep singing.

I am trying to teach him how to write. He is getting more interested in drawing and coloring, so I'm trying to have that more easily accesible.

He remember so much! He remembers one conversation I had with him regarding naps. I told him that he needs to go to bed so he can get all his energy back so he can play again, and he repeats that to me all the time. It is too funny.

This weekend we didn't do much of anything - once again. But, that was ok with me. We moved a lot of stuff around.

We finally got the "big boy bed" and installed it. His room looks great! I kindof envy it! He has all matching furniture and room for clothes in his drawers and a bookshelf that is mostly empty. It is pretty sweet! New sheets and a new bed. He hasn't gotten out of his bed at all at night which is wonderful. I was so worried that he was going to get in and out of bed all night but he hasn't. He is such a great and wonderful boy. He listens pretty much all of the time and I couldn't ask for a better child.

I just hope that the second one is just as good. :)

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

53

I am bummed today.

Well, bummed and excited.

We are trying to buy a bunk bed set on Craig's List. We still don't have an answer from the sellers but I am really hoping that they will sell it to us. I'm sure they will.

But, I am bummed because soon we are going to be moving our Big Boy out of his crib and into a big boy bed! :(

Awwww....

He really likes his crib. He doesn't get out of it, although he can if he wanted to. He always asks if he can get out before he climbs out and I even tell him he can get out but he doesn't.

I am just sad because this is such a big milestone. He is transitioning from his crib to a bed. I mean, I knew it was going to come sooner or later, but now with the baby only 53 days away, we have to do something for the new baby. I guess we could've kept him in his crib and used a pack and play for the baby, but yanno, we are going to have to do it at some point anyway.

Just another step in his growing up.

Awwww....

Monday, April 19, 2010

54

This weekend was a blur and pretty nice. Although yesterday was pretty warm, temperature wise.

Friday I had a nice "girl day" out. I went and got my toes done and right after that had a facial. It was really nice. I wish I could've had a massage, but it just isn't nice right now being pregnant. I mean, a prenatal massage is pretty nice, but I want to lay on my stomach and just have the tar massaged out of my back. That is the best part - when you put your head in the donut and you just sort of drift around in consciousness and not really think about anything too deep. Anyway, soon enough, I will be able to get a regular massage. I can't wait! Although, I will be really sad when I am not pregnant anymore. I am not sure how I feel about this one being the last baby. It is so much fun being pregnant, but Byron has made it abundantly clear that he does not want any more children. I may be able to persuade though, wink wink.

Well, then on Saturday we went to a company picnic. It was nice. This company goes all out for their employees, I must say. It was really nicely catered (as well as a picnic could be catered) with tons of food and they even had beer! They had 3 bounce houses and face painting and balloon sculptors and volleyball. We mainly just sat at the picnic table though and watched Squeakers jump in the bounce houses. He had a blast playing with the other kids. It was fun to watch. And, admittedly, I don't feel much like moving around these days. I am so doggone tired from being pregnant it is unbelievable! If I remember correctly, I had a lot of energy with the first pregnancy, but this one is totally wearing me down. My feet hurt at the end of the day and I really just feel like sitting on the couch and watching TV. I feel rather guilty though when my husband is chasing after the boy and doing stuff with him, but then again I feel like it keeps him busy and he likes to do that sort of stuff.

After the picnic we came home for some nap time and then we had dinner with our friends. It was good to have them over for dinner, we haven't done that in a while - probably because I haven't felt much like cooking lately.

Sunday we went to the movies to see "Dragon." It was cute and a good morning activity, but, man, are movie tickets getting expensive or what??? It was crazy! $14 for just my husband and I to go to a matinee! Oh well, I guess we don't go out too much so we can spend that on a movie. But, crap, I figured we could've bought the movie in a few months for that much money.

Then, the rest of the day was pretty lazy. More napping and sitting on the couch for me while the husband did stuff around the house.

He found a pretty awesome kids bedroom set on Craig's list that I really want to get. They want $550 for it. I can justify that much. I think if it isn't sold tomorrow, I will email them and see if they will take $525. I hope so. I really want this whole transition to go smoothly. But then what are we going to do with the queen bed? Oh gosh, I have no idea! Why is our house so small???!!

But, then I think about it and think that we are really lucky to even have a house these days.

Yes, yes - positive thoughts!

Plus, there are little birds out there saying we could have the chance to move to France or even to VA for a few months. How cool would that be? I would take either or, but VA might be easier. Plus, it would be for just a few months.

All in due time...

Thursday, April 15, 2010

58

The days, they are a-tickin!

Only 58 days to go!

Brannan has the most adorable thing he does lately. It goes like this:

B: Guess what????

Me: What?

B: I LOVE YOU!!!! (but it sounds like I loe you because he doesn't really say V's yet)

It is the most precious thing in the whole world and it melts my heart when he says it. I could be in the worst mood or frustrated with something and he will bust out with this little diatribe. It is so funny and it makes me laugh.

Oh, and also he has learned how to make farting noises with his black bath duck while in the tub. It is hilarious. Whenever I laugh he asks "I make you laugh mommy?"

Yes, little man, you do make me laugh, you do.

Monday, April 12, 2010

61

We have been recovering from last weekend. The whole event was rough, and it feels like there is something missing from the house. I haven't had the guts to move her bed outside so the other dog can lay on it out there, and whenever I walk down the hall into the other room, I see the bed there - empty. She always laid on that bed. I tried to keep her on that bed because she was starting to get a little incontinent and I didn't want her on the rugs or on the couches (not that she could jump up on the couches anyway.) But, the bed is empty every day and every night it stays there. I have only seen the other dog lay down on it twice since she has been gone. It is just a constant reminder that she is gone. I know she is gone and I think I have accepted it, but she was with me for 14 years! That is such a long time! She was one of my children. She was my first child. I had to make arrangements for her, I had to sometimes pass on things because I couldn't bring her with me, I had to make sure she was fed and watered and cared for all of the time. I always think that dogs are sort of a precursor to children. Whenever I see couples with dogs, you know that the next step will be the kids.

I was telling one of my friends that even though you know that you will outlive your dog, it is just so hard to prepare for it and to live through it. I mean, 14 years - that is a pretty long time to live with another living being.

I also feel sad for the other dog. It seems like she is more quiet since Leia has been gone. I don't know how to explain it - I mean, I guess she has always been quiet, and she does the growling and the barking at random things outside, but somehow, someway, she seems more quiet around the house. It is hard to explain.

I have been giving her a lot of "inside" time this past week too. Normally, I would keep the dogs outside most of the day because it is so nice out there, but I have been letting the other dog in a lot so she can hang out with me during the day.

The only thing I am glad about is that Leia didn't have to survive another summer here. They were really rough on her as she got older. She was always hot and it was getting harder and harder for her to get in and out of the pool. Hopefully she is romping around in the pine trees with the other doggies that she knew in her long life.

In other news - had another doctor's apppointment last week. Nothing special - just the quickie checking the heart rate and measuring my belly. We were in and out in a quick minute. They said everything is fine. I only gained 1 pound since the last two week appointment. YAY! Next week we have another ultrasound. I'm looking forward to it. I always love the ultrasounds. I think this one might be the last ultrasound before the big day. I'll be 32 weeks and after that, I think we start going once a week for standard appointments.

But, the baby has been moving a TON lately! I mean, like really really big swishes and flips and punches and kicks. Sometimes it seems like my whole body shakes from a kick or a punch. It is pretty neat to know that there is a little growing baby in there doing its thing.

Finally, the only other thing on my mind right now is getting the baby's room in order. We need to do a LOT of work. Ugh. More on that later. I should take some before and after photos. I think I'll do that.

I can't believe only 61 days left. Gosh, I remember when it was 222 and it seemed sooooo far away. 61 days - that is only 2 months. 8 weeks! (about). Oh, little one, you are going to be here before we know it!

Monday, April 5, 2010

68

It was a very rough weekend.

This past weekend we had to say goodbye to the best dog ever - my dog - my Leia dog.

We had gone out on Friday night to "movies in the park" at the local park. It was a ton of fun and Brannan had a good time watching Coraline the movie. We sang along to songs on the radio on the way home. We got home a little late, about 9ish, and Byron was tending to dragging everything into the house and I went straight for the door to let the dogs in.

The dogs came crashing in, as they always do, so so so happy to see us, ran past me and straight to Byron. He was standing in the living room right where the tile meets the hardwood. The dogs all crashed into him and Leia's back legs gave out as she slipped on the tile and she cried like never before. I started to scream and Byron kinda looked all around underneath him and just grabbed Leia and held her chest so she was hovering over the ground. She was still screaming and yelping her little doggie yelp like it hurt so much. I knew it hurt so much. I knew something bad had happened to her. I didn't want to face it, but I knew.

He laid her on her side on her bed that is right here in the kitchen. She started to shake in pain. I petted her and she wouldn't look me in the eye. We looked at her leg and it was all kindof tucked up next to her. She wouldn't stand up. We laid her there and just looked at her, not knowing what to do. I knew we had to do something, but it was already so late at night. I knew we were going to have to wait until morning. We gave her an asprin and started to get the baby ready for bed.

I felt so terrible and I knew she was in terrible pain. I kneeled down next to her on her round bed and petted her and cried. I knew it wasn't going to be good.

I busted into the baby's room and said we need to get her to the animal hospital and I can't lift her into the car myself. He curtly said to me "can I just get him into bed first?" At that point I knew he wasn't going to let me take her to the hospital.

We left her there for another half hour, her shaking stopped but her panting started. I know that is one way for dogs to deal with pain, they start panting. I tried to give her water, but she didn't want it. We decided we couldn't do anything that night so we would have to wait until morning. I went to the bathroom and cried some more and tried to get ready for bed.

I got really sick that night, woke up almost every hour to check on her and to throw up. At one point there wasn't anything left in my stomach to throw up. I checked on her again to make sure she was still breathing.

8 A.M. couldn't come soon enough.

We got out of bed about 6:30 and tried to take her out so she could go to the bathroom. She couldn't stand on her back legs at all. Byron tried to get her to squat a little to go, but she wouldn't. We put her bed outside so she could enjoy the cool morning air. The last cool morning air she would ever breathe in. That was her most favorite time of day. The cool mornings. She loved to sleep out on the patio and enjoy that quiet morning. She just plain liked the cold air - anywhere. She is like me, likes the cool and not the heat. I am so sad she is gone. I am so sad that she never licked me again. I would put my hand in front of her nose and every time I have ever done that in her life, she would give me slow, long licks on my hand. She wouldn't lick me after she got hurt.

So, I had some cereal at 7, watching the clock and knowing I needed to tend to the baby in my bellly - I was nauseous from not eating and throwing up all night and not sleeping. 7:45 finally came and I gently hinted that "daddy better get ready to go take Leia to the doggie doctor," talking to Brannan but really trying to get him to get her to the hospital.

We put her in the car - we left her on the bed and we both just carried the bed and the dog all together and set her in the back. Byron quickly went inside - I knew he was getting choked up. I sat there and petted her while Brannan asked question after question. "Why is Leia Leia Leia (what he calls her) in the car? Why is she going to the doggie doctor? Can I go to the doggie doctor? I want to go with Daddy." I just stood there and cried and petted her and said I was sorry. I knew I wouldn't see her again.

The next 3 hours passed with phone calls and decisions. X-rays and tears.

They found that she had dislocated her leg to the point where her joint was up by her spine. Her other leg had a fracture. There was a lot of arthritis. There wasn't anything that could've been done.

Byron had to stay with her those last moments. I haven't had the guts to ask him about it yet. I'm not ready to know.

I want to remember her in her glory. Running in the snow in Alaska, playing with the other dogs in Montana, riding in the back of Byron's Toyota through a hail storm in Oklahoma. Taking road trips to New Hampshire. Driving the Al-Can with me. Going on a road trip to Cabo San Lucas. Living in the car with me. Crying and laughing and dealing with all those grown-up things that I had to deal with over the past 14 years.

I got her in Flagstaff, moved with her to Utah and then to Alaska. She flew from Alaska back to Arizona, impressing all of the cargo workers at the airport as they let her out of her cage to run around before Byron picked her up. I didn't have any other contacts in Arizona besides my parents and didn't want to bother them to have to pick her up so I asked if Byron could be a contact - they called him first. Leia always loved him the best. She would always be at the front of the hiking trail with him. She wanted to ride with him, she wanted to be around him.

There are so many stories with Leia in them. She went everywhere with me. The only reason she wouldn't be without me is if I was going on a plane or a cruise - places that forbid dogs. Otherwise, she was with me. With us.

I remember when I first got Leia. I was living in Flagstaff. I called my parents to tell them the good news. My Dad said "what are you going to do with a dog?"

It turns out - absolutely EVERYTHING!