Monday, April 12, 2010

61

We have been recovering from last weekend. The whole event was rough, and it feels like there is something missing from the house. I haven't had the guts to move her bed outside so the other dog can lay on it out there, and whenever I walk down the hall into the other room, I see the bed there - empty. She always laid on that bed. I tried to keep her on that bed because she was starting to get a little incontinent and I didn't want her on the rugs or on the couches (not that she could jump up on the couches anyway.) But, the bed is empty every day and every night it stays there. I have only seen the other dog lay down on it twice since she has been gone. It is just a constant reminder that she is gone. I know she is gone and I think I have accepted it, but she was with me for 14 years! That is such a long time! She was one of my children. She was my first child. I had to make arrangements for her, I had to sometimes pass on things because I couldn't bring her with me, I had to make sure she was fed and watered and cared for all of the time. I always think that dogs are sort of a precursor to children. Whenever I see couples with dogs, you know that the next step will be the kids.

I was telling one of my friends that even though you know that you will outlive your dog, it is just so hard to prepare for it and to live through it. I mean, 14 years - that is a pretty long time to live with another living being.

I also feel sad for the other dog. It seems like she is more quiet since Leia has been gone. I don't know how to explain it - I mean, I guess she has always been quiet, and she does the growling and the barking at random things outside, but somehow, someway, she seems more quiet around the house. It is hard to explain.

I have been giving her a lot of "inside" time this past week too. Normally, I would keep the dogs outside most of the day because it is so nice out there, but I have been letting the other dog in a lot so she can hang out with me during the day.

The only thing I am glad about is that Leia didn't have to survive another summer here. They were really rough on her as she got older. She was always hot and it was getting harder and harder for her to get in and out of the pool. Hopefully she is romping around in the pine trees with the other doggies that she knew in her long life.

In other news - had another doctor's apppointment last week. Nothing special - just the quickie checking the heart rate and measuring my belly. We were in and out in a quick minute. They said everything is fine. I only gained 1 pound since the last two week appointment. YAY! Next week we have another ultrasound. I'm looking forward to it. I always love the ultrasounds. I think this one might be the last ultrasound before the big day. I'll be 32 weeks and after that, I think we start going once a week for standard appointments.

But, the baby has been moving a TON lately! I mean, like really really big swishes and flips and punches and kicks. Sometimes it seems like my whole body shakes from a kick or a punch. It is pretty neat to know that there is a little growing baby in there doing its thing.

Finally, the only other thing on my mind right now is getting the baby's room in order. We need to do a LOT of work. Ugh. More on that later. I should take some before and after photos. I think I'll do that.

I can't believe only 61 days left. Gosh, I remember when it was 222 and it seemed sooooo far away. 61 days - that is only 2 months. 8 weeks! (about). Oh, little one, you are going to be here before we know it!

No comments: